The Crab

3 live Santa Barbara Rock crabs from Quality Seafood
2 12 oz bottles of Red Stripe Jamaican lager
2 12 oz bottles of hot water
12 oz white vinegar
Penzey’s Shrimp and Crab Boil
Old Bay Seasoning

1. Fill the yellow stockpot with ice, layer a bit of plastic on top, then drop in the bag of live crabs. Put the lid on but leave it slightly ajar so the crabs can breathe.
2. In the red stock pot, place the steam basket upside-down and add lager, water, vinegar, and crab boil spices. Cover and bring to a boil.
3. Have your husband pick up two crabs and dump them in the red stock pot. Cook for about 30 minutes, checking for doneness at 20 minutes if necessary. Remove and serve with Old Bay seasoning.
4. Repeat cooking process for the third crab.

Sweet, succulent, meaty and no dressings necessary! Next time, however, bring out the rolling pin to help you dismantle the bugger; it'll save your fingers from looking like sliced sushi. Being a novice at crab consumption, I tried to be a dainty eater and pick out (with my fingers) the yummy bits from the network of razor sharp cartilage. Bad, bad idea...

The Salad

3 leaves butterhead lettuce
5 fingerling potatoes, boiled
4 hard boiled eggs, sliced
3 red bell peppers, roasted, cored, and sliced into strips
12-18 grape tomatoes (red, yellow, orange, pink, and green), halved
8-12 pieces of artichoke heart with piquillo pepper courtesy Whole Foods
1 shallot, sliced
capers
niçoise olives

Simple Balsamic Vinaigrette

²/₃ cup extra virgin olive oil
¹/₃ cup balsamic vinaigrette
1-2 tsps dijon mustard
1 shallot, sliced
freshly ground black pepper
salt

Use more lettuce and select green beans with a smoother skin. Those details aside, the salad was absolutely perfect.