For the last several days, I’ve snubbed Christmas menu preparations for earthier delights: shopping, reading, listening, and posting in my less kosher blog Caput Lupinum (closed to the public). But alas, the time for dalliance is at an end. Christmas is just two weeks away, and if I’m going to execute a Devious, Masterful Plan, The Plan must be given form!

Christmas and New Years are perhaps my favorite "food holidays" because there are less stringent expectations concerning what ought to be served. Thanksgiving is a straight-jacket for the creative menu. Iconic dishes, like roast turkey, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, etc, limit how far one can deviate and experiment. Serve something aside from the usual staples and you’re likely to hear uproar. But is there a classic winter menu? Well, for one, nobody can agree on the main; is it ham, beef wellington, a rib roast, or deep fried Jewish latkes? This year in foodie publication, I’ve seen all of the above and more, including lamb, duck, cornish hens, and, yes, roast turkey. The confusion is a blessing, if you ask me. My husband has only one request of the Christmas menu: cookies, and lots of them. We’ll revisit that subject later.

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Sweat was flowing down my back, and I was still catching my breath after running on the treadmill. My husband, returning to the gym room with the weekly grocery ads, turned to me and grumbled, "There’s no special on turkeys this year." "Huh?" was my articulate response. I looked and indeed, there was barely a nary a mention of the holiday bird. I shrugged and said, "So?" He eyed me somewhat blandly and said, "Thanksgiving is next week." I gaped at him. I stuttered. I vehemently denied. And then I realized I was speaking with the family’s resident encyclopedia of doom, and I thought, ‘He must be right.’

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Muahahaha! I have perfected the 100% whole grain bagel—or at least I’ve come close enough to appease my own inner critic. Here are a few final tips, as this post is probably my last on the subject of bagels:

1. To shape the bagel properly: use an oiled surface. Yes, you heard me. Oiled. I did try using Reinhart's damp surface. Ultimately, the water did the job too well. The dough ends stuck to each other, but the dough also stuck to the surface. So, keep a smidgen of water nearby to seal the ends together, but roll on an oiled surface.
2. When rolling the "snake" out, the dough should be at least 12-15 inches in length. Then, and this is IMPORTANT, do not wrap the snake around your fist.

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When experienced bread bakers like Peter Reinhart give you explicit instructions, it’s time to stop making up crap and listen up. Yes, yes, we all like to experiment in the kitchen. But seriously, stop. Take a deep breath. Remember bad things happen to those wander aimlessly in the wild frontier. Or, if you’re like me and walking in the rose garden sounds too tame, forge your own path and discover why you are wrong wrong W-R-O-N-G.

I arrived in the kitchen this morning a bit off my game. Sure, I lowered the oven rack and solved the dough consistency problem I bitched about last time (more on that later); I even obtained a nice OXO silicon basting brush and did a fair job at topping my bagels. But I was feeling a bit tired and juggling dinner prep, photography, phone conversations, cleaning, and baking. At times, I walked away from important steps or left things where they were even after the timer went off. Lesson No 1: mise en place, “everything in its place.”

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Okay, I know this bagel looks a little burnt and slightly less bagel-shaped than it should, but the texture and flavor is some of the best I’ve ever had out of any bagel ever. (And that includes the fresh bagels from the bakery.) It’s deliciously chewy throughout the interior, just slightly crusty on the outside, with beautiful subtle flavors of sour and onion. I’m in love.

The three most obvious and important considerations for future success are:

• Baking temperature or the rack position in the oven. The freshly chopped onions on top burned to a crisp and even the dough turned a tad darker than preferable in a few spots. So, next time, use the lower rack or turn the temperature down to 425°F.
• Shaping technique. I thought Peter Reinhart was exaggerating when he said to make the center hole two inches wide. To my great surprise, the hole shrunk drastically as the bagel expanded in the second fermentation. Check out this video for a great example of bagel shaping.

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My first attempt at Peter Reinhart’s rye meteil was a slight disappointment. The crumb was too dense. The crust wasn’t perfectly golden brown, crisp and chewy. The flavor was definitely an improvement over active-dry yeast bread, but the wild yeast probably could have used a bit more maturation. Finally, the single free standing loaf was huge, oblong and unsymmetrical (due to a mishap during transfer of the bread to the oven); in short, it was an unwieldy beast.

But one never becomes a baker without a second attempt (and a third and a fourth…), so I resolved the second time to make a few adjustments.

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